Woke up this morning determined to have good music on while cooking up the weekend breakfast for my loved one..as I'm gadget-challenged (and our 'home theater system' is possibly a spaceship in disguise) - I have had to write down all the instructions on a piece of paper just to turn the radio on.
Long story short- today is about All India Radio's (AIR) FM Rainbow (107.1 MHz). Now, this is a pleasant surprise- they play the best music between 8 and 11 AM every single day. Its English. Its diverse and eclectic - could be the Rocking 40's one day and the latest trance-electronica the next..(In the words of Forrest Gump..it's like a box of chocolates...)...but the best part of the show is not even the music! Its the AIR quirks..which you will ONLY find on AIR and other Government run services..as I like to say-'ITS SOOO BAD, THAT ITS GOOOOD!!!'....here are my Top 5 quirks..
You get 3 hours of the best english music (as long as you are not too picky about the genre or even the decade/century sometimes)..but here is the FUN part..like all things run by the Indian Government, of course there are oddities, disasters and some downright surreal moments in these 3 hours..and actually, I prefer to believe that this almost adds to the 'quirky character' of the entire shennanigan...
Sample these..my top 5..
1. Sometimes, the RJs dont turn up, and then, instead of just playing the music, they bring in maybe the newsreader or I suspect sometimes the accountant or receptionist..and they ACT AS RJs!! Now these days are truly hilarious ..beast experienced..there is NOTHING i can say to describe it that will do justice.
2. 'Our Buddy Deens' - one of the RJs on this show, she turns up Monday mornings - and there is no excuse for her. I cannot even call her quirky. She is simply ridiculous. Her accent is your run-of-the-mill, garden variety middle class Indian english accent...unfortunately this accent does not sound good in complex, long-winded sentences..but our buddy Deens (her words not mine) actually says the following "Hey, this is your Buddy Deens on a Monday Morning, here to keep you resonating to the electromagnetic airways of 107.1 FM Rainbow from All India Radio"...picture Apu from the Simpsons saying this and you know what I mean.
3. Sometimes, the RJs who are afterall Government employees (and therefore cannot get fired) will actually just go off for a cup of tea in the middle of a perfectly good selection of music; and forget to come back..so what was meant to be one Beatles song turns into the entire Album..and this you must endure, till the Chai-ki-tapri gets too crowded for our RJ and he/she finally returns to his/her seat..
4. Sometimes, when the show is running out of time - when the RJ has wasted precious time reading out bits from Chickensoup For the Soul or some inane forwarded email - they just skip bits of the song! So you start off normally enough, with the first line, and then suddenly, its the 7th line and then suddenly its the last chorus..trust me- it makes you send up a silent prayer that these guys are not DJs
5. This is one of the gems - the Ads. Now, there is an ad break every 10 minutes or so - which is so much better than the Private stations that play a song every 10 minutes or so..but the Ads..oh AIR, AIR..what are you thinking? I'd really love to peek into the heads of the Programming Manager here for a sec..the Ads between trance electronica (or even Wham & PSB for that Matter) are in Marathi, and are usually public service messages that are clearly meant for the Rural audiences...about washing hands, investing in Kisaan Yojana's, getting Polio drops, using condoms and so on. Now, either the farmers in Vidharba are loving Pop Music or the people of Bombay who like english music over plagarised bollywood tracks really need a second round of basic health education..but you have to hear these poorly-produced rustic jingles to believe them. AIR, what are you thinking? You could make MONEY off this show!!! There are people with disposable incomes listening!!!! *sigh*
Anyway- that was my top 5 but there are SO MANY more...I'll do another list some other day..but you know, for all these 'quirks', I think if it aint too broke, dont try to fix it! I think this is a show or a time slot that the Babu's once instituted and forgot about..(Maybe the last time Prince Charles visited) so if they discover it, they may change it - god forbid - even try to improve it! and I dont want that to happen...let it be....
PS- this morning they played Dire Straits, Pet Shop Boys, Bangles, even Wham...so it was kind of music from my generation and I really enjoyed it!! Got the partner up and we did a little jig in the kitchen to 'dont need money, dont need fame, dont need your credit card to ride this train!'
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